Believe it or not, one of the reasons you feel that way is because of the moon and the retrograde of Venus. The retrograde of Venus has made you feel out of place as if you can't find the reason to keep fighting, more negative and much more of. But the full moon on October 9 has made you recharge all those energies and feel stronger.
Suddenly you realize that you can get out of this and whatever they throw at you. The moon's energy has made you see that you are much stronger than you thought and that, although life puts you in front of many difficult situations, you are going to get out of them in the best possible way. That courage and that bravery are going to be what makes you come out no matter how deep you are.